Tanubhrt.This.Side

Sometimes the more materialistic things you have in your life, the emptier it gets! I never thought this way, I always thought having money can lead you to happiness, with no exertions and all things good. That having the best of the earpods or the best of the keyboard would make me happy. Having lot of savings or giving away gifts might make me happy. They do! There is no denying, never would I deny, but that does not last forever. Forget forever, that does not lasts even for a reasonable time.

I have been feeling emptiness in my life. As if nothing does matter, not the money, nor the gifts, nothing else. For so long, I thought that the real happiness comes when we do something for someone else, having done that, I know it does not. Sometimes no matter how much you do, it is always less, or even if its not less, it seems there is something else that is required, and doing all of that, letting go of your might be happiness, the other person is still not happy.

In the search of finding happiness, I thought may be talking to friends does gives us some sense of happiness, honestly it does not. Money, people, are just like the vacation trip that you take to a fancy hotel. You know that it would not last forever and you would have to go back to your own life. For someone like me, I have a tendency of irritating others when things are not right in my life as well. Idiot right! Selfish I know.

Days keep passing by, with nothing happening. The last 30 days remaining the same, looking at people, feeling jealous, not being content with what I have and on! Sometimes it feels as if since the time is so much, so much in hand, that I have stopped being bothered about it as well. Watching youtube, instagram, talking to people, it all adds into an emptiness that seems to be increasing with time.

But, this time I would want to know what exactly makes me happy. What can I do, to make myself happy. Is it just one thing or a series of things that need to be done, a series of changes, I know for sure, of which all of them have to be internal changes. They say it happens in months, so, in this month of June, I pledge not to use youtube, instagram, whatsapp or even call anyone. This is something that is involuntary, might not require my effort. The other thing, I pledge to do in the month of june is to go for a jog daily. So, the next 30 days will go for a jog daily, and jogging for one hour.

I hope that may be being fit, would make me happy, considering I am over weight. I think happiness is not one thing, like not one thing that could make me happy, but a series of things that would make me happy. A series of good habits, well I am not sure of this, but will take finding happiness or creating happiness as a series of steps, as a staircase, or a video game, where each level would add something.

Signing off,

Avantika Tanubhrt